If I watch any more sports, they're going to take away my woman membership card

Haven't posted in a while because I'm still trying to recover from my beloved Indians' loss to the Boston Red Sux. I work with some particularly obnoxious Sux fans and it's bringin' me down, man. The only thing worse would be if OSU loses to Michigan in a few weeks because I also work with some obnoxious UofM fans. I've so been enjoying my beloved Buckeyes' winning streak over the Loserines.

Things which have eluded me into adulthood

• How to microwave something on Medium Power
• How to drive a stick shift
• Why people don’t know the difference between its and it’s
• Doing math in my head (if I don’t have a piece of paper, I can’t carry the one)
• Keeping Kleenex in my purse, or anywhere on my person, despite year-round allergies
• The ability to dispose of a spider without using the vacuum cleaner
• How to separate an egg
• Why anyone in their right mind would run, unless they’re being chased

Eat it, Yankees!!!

Boston, you're next.